My Toddler Holds In Their Poop
The short answer
Stool withholding is very common in toddlers and is often triggered by a painful bowel movement that makes the child afraid to poop again. It can also emerge during potty training when children feel pressure or anxiety about using the toilet. The resulting cycle of withholding, harder stools, and pain can be frustrating, but it is highly treatable with a combination of stool softeners, dietary changes, and patient, pressure-free encouragement.
By Age
What to expect by age
Stool withholding can begin at this age, usually triggered by a single painful bowel movement that frightens the child. You may notice your toddler stiffening their legs, clenching their buttocks, crossing their legs, or hiding in a corner when they feel the urge to poop. They are not trying to be difficult - they are genuinely trying to avoid pain. Talk to your pediatrician about using a stool softener to break the cycle and make bowel movements comfortable again.
This age marks the beginning of potty training readiness for some children, and introducing the toilet too early or with too much pressure can trigger stool withholding. If your child is withholding, it is best to pause potty training and focus first on making pooping comfortable and painless. Continue using diapers or pull-ups without shame, soften stools with medication if recommended by your pediatrician, and offer high-fiber foods and plenty of water.
Stool withholding is most common during active potty training. Many toddlers will urinate on the toilet successfully but insist on a diaper for bowel movements. This is a normal transitional stage. Allowing your child to poop in a diaper while continuing to work on comfort and confidence is far better than forcing toilet use and worsening the withholding cycle. Reading books about pooping, using a step stool for proper posture, and celebrating small steps all help.
If stool withholding has been ongoing, your child may have developed a pattern of chronic constipation where the rectum has stretched to accommodate large, hard stools. This can reduce the urge to go and may lead to soiling accidents (encopresis). Your pediatrician may recommend a longer course of stool softeners to allow the rectum to return to its normal size, along with a consistent toileting routine. Resolution takes time but is very achievable with patience and medical support.
What Should You Do?
When to take action
- Your toddler occasionally resists pooping for a day but eventually goes without significant distress
- Your child prefers to poop in a diaper rather than on the toilet during potty training but is pooping regularly
- Your child briefly stiffens or hides when they feel the urge but then has a normal bowel movement
- Your child's withholding behavior is improving with dietary changes and encouragement
- Your toddler is regularly withholding stool for three or more days at a time, resulting in large, painful bowel movements
- Stool withholding is significantly interfering with potty training progress or causing your child distress
- Your child has developed a pattern of soiling accidents (small amounts of stool leaking into underwear) between large bowel movements
- Your child has not had a bowel movement in over a week and has abdominal pain, distension, or vomiting
- Your child is in severe pain, has blood in the stool, or is refusing to eat due to discomfort from stool withholding
Sources
Related Resources
Related Digestive Concerns
My Baby's Belly Looks Swollen
A rounded, slightly protruding belly is completely normal in babies and toddlers due to immature abdominal muscles and their proportionally larger organs. However, if the belly becomes suddenly swollen, feels hard and tight, or is accompanied by pain, vomiting, or changes in bowel movements, it needs medical evaluation as it could signal gas buildup, constipation, or rarely, something more serious.
My Baby Has an Anal Fissure (Blood When Pooping)
A small streak of bright red blood on the surface of your baby's stool or on the diaper is most commonly caused by an anal fissure, which is a tiny tear in the skin around the anus from passing hard stool. Anal fissures are very common in babies and toddlers and usually heal on their own with simple measures like keeping stools soft. While this is rarely serious, any blood in your baby's stool should be mentioned to your pediatrician.
My Baby Eats Non-Food Items (Pica)
It is completely normal for babies and young toddlers to explore by putting objects in their mouths. True pica, which is the persistent eating of non-food substances, is uncommon before age two and may be linked to iron deficiency or developmental factors. If your child repeatedly seeks out and eats non-food items past the typical mouthing stage, it is worth discussing with your pediatrician.
Baby Excessive Gas After Starting Solids
Increased gas after starting solid foods is completely normal and expected. Your baby's digestive system is encountering new proteins, fibers, and sugars for the first time and needs time to adapt. The gut bacteria are also diversifying, which naturally produces more gas. This typically improves within a few weeks as the digestive system adjusts to each new food.
My Baby Gulps Air While Feeding
Swallowing some air during feeding is normal for all babies, but excessive air gulping can lead to gas, hiccups, and spit-up. Common causes include fast milk flow, poor latch (if breastfeeding), bottle nipple flow that's too fast or slow, and crying before feeds. Simple adjustments to feeding position, pacing, and equipment can usually help reduce air intake significantly.
Baby Poop Color Changes with Solids
Dramatic changes in poop color after starting solids are completely normal and expected. What your baby eats directly affects stool color - carrots may turn poop orange, spinach makes it green, beets can make it reddish, and blueberries can turn it dark blue-black. As long as your baby is comfortable and the stool is not white, black (tarry), or bright red with blood, these color changes are harmless.